| im gettin money...lots of it. i dare anyone to try and make my life any better right now. |
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| i feel like i have nothing goin for me after high school. i mean what am i going to do? i dont have money for college and neither do my parents. thats what i want to do but it seems so unlikely. i like looking at the upside of things. but whats the upside of being broke and dumb, i cant even get into tcc without money. my friends are going to bigger colleges right after this shit and im stuck prolly working my ass off just to get into tcc. i dont want to grow up. i want summer to come and ill get drunk and high every day and just fuck around, go to the beach and shit. but i cant do that. life sucks then you die i guess. i just dont want to feel like a programmed robot or something. i dont want to fight with kelsie anymore. she is the most important thing to me and i keep doin stupid shit, hoping she wont get mad at me for it but she does. so im not going to be stupid anymore. i just want to make her truely happy. im going to do everything i can to do that. what lies before us, and what lies behind us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us. god blessed me in many way. i have the girl, the friends, the job, and god gave me a future...i just dont know it yet. i may make my own future, but im sure fate will decide where i end up. and hopefully despite the bad things i have done earlier in life, those actions will be weighed out by the achievements and the good things i try and do for people. |
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| everythings great. i love my new job. its so slack and i like having money now. i want to buy things for people now..i feel like im in debt. my birthdays in a week and a few days im finally gunna be 18. i want to quit smoking weed. i really do. i feel so anti social and retarded when im high. even though i do so much better on my school work and playing sports. or maybe i just think it helps....? who knows. kelsie and i are wonderful. shes all i can ask for in a girl. and its way too much to explain. but one thing is im an odd fella hahaha but she doesnt seem to mind and that makes me happy. i love life. |
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| i have everything in the world i could ask for. except my car. life is wonderful. and its beautiful outside today. work later though. and tomorrow and saturday. oh well its $$$$$$$$$$$$$$ i missed you kelsie :) <33333 |
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